How long has it been?

Here I go...self reflection be my guide.  Seems like a I shed all things uncool until I am lubricated.  Ego be damned.

So what if I stay up all night and write myself into a slumber?  If there was ever to be time to get it all out and I am just typing to let it all go, maybe I can pick up a good thread of consciousness along the way.

Just to be honest about my situation since this is going to serve as a diary if i ever had one..

I have done exactly what I didn't want to do again...I have gone and fallen in love.  Are these feelings just OCD incarnate?  Am I disguising how I really feel with infatuation?

I wanted to be single and unattached so badly.  I was trying so hard to be an adult and move like a cold water stream through my next romantic endeavors and along came someone that I can't shake.  More importantly, do I want to?

I am playing the comparison game now, finding solidity in what his is that the last one is not.

Might be a smart move to make a list....not what I like about anyone, but what I want.  commence with the bullet points:
(If he ever finds this....he's going to wonder "Where's your head at?" Basement Jaxx reference)

• I thought I wanted someone into movies.  Let's examine that knowing what I know now....this is someone who is reeling for what people think about what people are creating.  This can be a slippery slope as I should probably have made the first bullet point "someone who doesn't care what other people think"  Ok, this one is a practice round then...

• Someone who doesn't care about what other people think.  This one is not to say that they aren't aware of appearance and actions altogether, but someone that can:
• Be Silly
• Know what they like and defend it if challenged (meaning that they have solid reasons why)
• Laugh at themselves
• Argue, but not get violent or too wrapped up in the argument to make light of the situation
• Be able to make me laugh
• Be willing to try new things
• Be OK with a situation not being ideal, but think of the experience overall
• Gotta be into music...but who isn't these days?  Ok, someone who has good taste in music with an open mind, but not someone who is deconstructing everything they hear and loving the classics because they are classics
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